Your Wish Is My Command

Moving on [Lay]

Requested by anon peach




Present day:  

You see her giggle over the text she had just received. You know well who it is from but you don’t care enough to make any remarks.

“Oh hey _________, I didn’t see you come in,” Su ji says raising her head.

“Ah, I just came back.”

“How was it? Did they say you have a chance?” she asks enthusiastically.

“I’m not sure. They always put on such a poker face it’s hard to tell. I’ve been waiting for my debut for so long. It’s about time they give me something..” you sigh.

“Aish, you’ll get there soon,” she says with an encouraging smile. You smile back just like always, when you look at her. Only you knew the pain of having to live life like that. Suji was a much younger trainee than you and she was soon debuting while you were still waiting for the big news. On top of that she was dating the man you once loved madly, still did and you knew in your heart that you always will.

*************************************************

Flashback:

You walked down the hall towards your practice room casually, when someone grabbed you and pulled you into a tiny room. Before you could open your mouth to scream, two hands covered your mouth. The person brought his lips close to your ear and whispered, “Don’t scream. It’s me.” The wrinkles on your forehead disappeared and a smooth smile covered your lips. You turned around slightly only to be pinned against the wall.

“How long are we going to keep it like this?” you asked. He shrugged his shoulders and brought himself a little more close to you.

“I don’t know,” he finally said and leaned in to kiss you. You looked away.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Nothing,” you mumbled.

“_____________, if this is still about keeping this relationship a secret than you already know my answer,” he said and turned around.

“Why can’t we tell anyone? It’s been over a year Yixing. I’m getting tired of it.”

“You know it wouldn’t be right. Neither for you nor for me. They’ll make us breakup before either one of us debuts.”

“We can figure something out later.”

“Be realistic ________,” he said a little more sternly this time.

“Are you sure that’s the only reason or is there something else?” you asked, getting a little suspicious.

“What do you mean?” he turned around, looking really hurt. You wanted to say more but you thought it better to not. You hated arguing with him.

“Nothing,” you mumbled and began to leave.

“______________,” he called after you.

“Ye,” you turned around. He came closer and held your hand. Your sixth sense told you that something bad was about to happen.

“I love you,” he said. His words made you smile. No matter how much the two of you fought over that topic, he always found a way to make you feel better. “but,” he continued, “I think we should take a break.”

“What?” you gasped. The smile escaped your face as quickly as it had come. You were confused and a little shaken. His hand began to slide away. You tried to regain the grip but it was too late. “What do you mean?” you asked.

“All of this.. there’s just too much happening right now. I think we both need some time to ourselves.”

“If this is about what I said earlier than I take all of that back. I promise to never bring it up again,” you said in sort of a desperate way. Had you known your wishes were going to lead this, you would have never uttered such words. You were regretting them more than ever.  “I’m sorry Yixing.”

“No ________, you don’t have to be sorry. What I’m saying is better for both of us.”

“But why all of a sudden?”

“Because..,” he trailed off. Both you and him stood in a deep cutting silence. You wanted answers to your questions. He was afraid because he didn’t have any. You were so deeply engulfed in your thoughts that you didn’t even realize that he had left. He left without saying anything. He left you heartbroken.

.

.

You didn’t have to wait long to find out why he had done that. Three months after your breakup, Yixing debuted under the group called Exo M. It started making sense to you. He did it because he knew the time was nearing so he had to prepare himself. Take his mind off of you and focus more on what was ahead of him.

You on the other hand were still a trainee. A year passed by in a breeze but a lot had changed. Suji had joined the company as a beginner. Yixing was better known with his stage name –Lay. You had avoided bumping into him ever since the breakup. It hurt to see him and it hurt even more when you saw him with Suji.

*************************************************************

Present day:

You sit across from Suji, swinging your leg back and forth, in a deep state of thinking. The door suddenly opens and in walks Lay.

“Why haven’t you been replying to my message,” he says.

“I was just about to,” Suji replies tucking her hair back. He leans in to give her a peck but she pushes him away and signals him to turn around. He does as she says and almost jumps back realizing that you are in the room too. Seeing you so up close, after so long brings a different sort of expression to his face. You can’t read it anymore. It’s hard to. He has distanced himself enough from you, for you to be able to tell what he is thinking.

You smile and get up to leave.

“_____________,” he calls your name. “You don’t have to go.”

‘Oh the irony’- you think to yourself and continue out the door.  If only he had said those words a year ago.

“What happened to her?” Suji asks him as soon as you leave. Lay caresses her cheek and then shakes his head. To this day he has been debating if he should tell her about the relationship he had with you.

*******************************************************************

You walked into the building with a heavy heart the next day. You didn’t quite know if it was because of seeing Lay the night before or that you were just tired of waiting for your chance to debut.  A staff member called you from the corner and signaled you to go to the office. Your heart began to race. As you took each step, you got even more nervous. All sorts of questions popped up in your head. Why would they be calling you? Are you getting rejected or do they have a good news for you?

You were asked to settle in the chair opposite, the recruitment officer. She was the one who had spotted you outside of your school four years ago.  

“So we have finally made a decision for you,” she said. You didn’t know how to respond so you continued to stare at her with a blank expression.

“We have decided to debut you with [Group name] and you will be given the position of the leader.”

“Aigoo,” you blurted out but immediately covered your mouth. You couldn’t believe the words that had just come out of her mouth. She went on to tell you the names of the members but you are too absorbed in your own thoughts to take note of it. Then suddenly you heard a familiar word – ‘Suji’.

“Suji?” you repeated.

“Ah ye, she will be the maknae of the group.”

You immediately clenched your fist and felt your heart sink. Your eyes blinked repeatedly but the information still didn’t sink in. Your heart, your brain, your thoughts, all of them refused to accept it.

“____________ are you alright?” the recruiter asked.

“Huh,” you shook your head. “Ah ye.”

You left the office and slowly walked towards the practice room. As soon as you entered, you heard the girls screaming. They ran towards you and hugged you.

“I am so happy,” you heard one of them say.

“I am so glad you’ll be our leader,” Suji patted your back. “Oh my God I can’t wait to tell Lay.”

You gave her a disgusted look and immediately turned around so she wouldn’t have to witness it. 

You were happy but more than that, you were sad. You knew you weren’t strong enough to have to face Suji every day. No matter how hard you tried to like her there was always a little part of you that envied her. She always got more than she deserved. You were a human after all. Throughout the past year you hadn’t allowed your heart to feel anything against her but that day was different. You hated her. You didn’t want to be around her. Little did you know for what was yet to come…

**********************************************

You slid into your bed and turned on the TV. It was the perfect way to get your mind off of whatever that had happened earlier that day.  Skipping through channels your finger automatically stopped on the one Exo M was being interviewed on. You had to admit, you had never seen any of their interviews. Lay looked marvelous. Your eyes followed every little movement of his. Even though it had been more than a year since your break up with him, nothing had changed. You still felt the same way towards him. You still wanted to be with him. If only, he knew how much it hurt you to see him with Suji.

“So Lay, you said that you had a big announcement for us today,” the MC asked him.

“Ah, ye. Indeed I do,” he nodded, joining both his hands and leaning forward. “It’s about my girlfriend.”

“Whaa,” the MC gasped. Your jaw dropped in surprise too. You couldn’t believe what you had heard.

“What’ s her name?” the MC asked, after recovering from the heavy bomb Lay had dropped on him.

“Her name is Suji. She is currently a trainee at SM but will soon be debuting.”

You didn’t notice your tears until they dropped on your arm. You shook your head and wiped them off still bewildered and broken. How could he do this to you? He was the one who always said it wasn’t a good idea to tell everyone. And now he was telling the world about it. It didn’t make sense. What was he thinking?

You felt your body collapse on the bed. You turned your head and buried it into the pillow. You wanted to scream but who would come to help? No one. There was absolutely no one…

***************************************************

Almost everyone had left after practice. You, however decided to stay after. You had spent the entire day debating if you should leave or stay. Was there any point in staying at the company if it was going to hurt you every day? You hated yourself for being so weak and not being able to move on.

You stood in the small balcony staring at the dark sky. It was going to start raining soon.

“ Congratulations,” you heard someone say from behind. You turned around, only to find Lay walk towards you. He was the last person you wanted to see at the moment.

“What? So you won’t even talk to me anymore?” he asked, nudging your elbow casually.

“I might leave,” you said after a long pause.

“What do you mean?” he asked, a little surprised. “Isn’t this you wanted ________? You had been waiting for so long. Why do you want to leave now?”

“You won’t understand,” you scoffed.

“What do you ..?” he stopped half way and scrutinized your face. “What is it ________? Come on.. you know you can tell me anything.”

“Really?” you raised your eyebrows, irritated at his casualness. How could he act so normal when he hadn’t talked to you in almost a year?

“Are you mad at me?” he asked, sensing the irritation in your voice.

“Of course I’m mad at you.” You suddenly snapped. You just couldn’t take it anymore. “Do you not dee anything? Are you blind?”

“What are you trying..”

“You’ll never get it will you? Do you even realize how much it hurts me to see you and Suji together? You are such a hypocrite Lay. You ended our relationship because you didn’t want anyone to know about us and now you go on announcing it to the world? If you didn’t love me then why didn’t you just say it straight up? At least, I wouldn’t have gone on believing the lie you had told me. And now, I have to be in the same group as her. See her face every day. Do you really think I can handle all of this? I’m just so ..” you closed your eyes and covered your face with your hands. All the anger that had been boiling up inside you had come out without a warning. You’d left him dumbfounded. He didn’t have anything to say. You were right. He had never bothered giving you any explanations. You looked at him for response but there wasn’t any. He was ashamed and so were you.

“You know what, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said all that,” you said, forcing a smile on your face. You began to walk but he held your hand.

“_________, don’t give up on this. You and I both now how much you wanted this. I may not love you like I did but I still care about you. I want to see you succeed. If you give on this today, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life. I know it will hurt in the beginning but you’ll get over it. And one day a guy will come in your life who will love you and only you. You’ll forget about me. I promise.”

“It’s not that easy.”

“It will be…just .. please don’t go like this.” He slowly let your hand slide out of his. You looked into his eyes and after a long time, you could tell what he was thinking. He really did care this time.

A tear fell from your eye but you wiped it away before he could even lift his hand. You nodded your head with a smile and began to leave.

“And , I’m really sorry for what I did to you,” he mumbled. You had forgiven him already. He didn’t need to say those words, yet it felt good to hear them. You turned half way and this time smiled from all your heart.

Maybe, one day you were going to find someone who loved you and only you. ..

_______________________________________________________________

Writing this was really hard because being the possessive person I am, I want Lay to be mine and ONLY mine. LOL .

Anyways, I hope you guys like it :) <3 <3  

posted 6 years ago with 50 notes

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