Your Wish Is My Command

Fear [U-Kwon]

Requested by secretstorywriter

You were deeply immersed in the book you had been reading that you didn’t even notice Yukwon come and sit across you. He watched you intently as you tucked your hair back and fixed your glasses from minute to minute. He didn’t realize that he had been staring at you.

“Aigoo,” you gasped when you suddenly looked up.

“Aigoo,” he jumped back too.

“When did you get here?” you asked.

“A few minutes ago,” he replied, moving next to you. “What are you reading?”

“It’s one of the old ones on my reading list that I never finished.”

“Then it can wait to be finished a little longer.” He leaned and kissed you on your lips.

“No it can’t. It’s waiting for me to finish it,” you tried to take it back from him but he was stronger, and taller. You were not going to win. He leaned in once again and kissed you. This time you didn’t interrupt him. After pulling you, he gave you another quick peck on your cheek.

“So are you ready?” he asked a little seriously.

“Ready? For what?” you asked immersing yourself back in the book.

“__________,” he took the book away from you and put it on the table. “You know exactly what I’m talking about.”

“No I don’t,” you said, sounding perfectly convincing.

“_________,” he held your hand and lifted it closer to his chest. “You can’t keep running from this.”

“Who said I’m running from it?” you said, pulling your hand away and looking elsewhere. “And can we not talk about it? I really am looking forward to a good day today you know.”

“Okay okay,” Yukwon lifted his hands in the air. “We’ll do as you say.”

“Alright then let’s go out somewhere.” You jumped off of the couch instantly, and pulled him up too.

*********************************************

“When I said go out, I meant somewhere good. Why are we in a park?” you asked sarcastically.

“Because I wanted to be here,” he said taking your hand in his. “I want to show you something.”

“Aish, I’m hungry. Get me some food first,” you whined.

“Aniyo, we’re almost there,” he said dragging you to the other corner of the park. You couldn’t figure out where he was taking you since the last time you came to the park, or left the house was almost a month ago. Summer, had been a long one. You spent most of it trying to forget about the past events.

“There it is,” Yukwon lifted his hand.

“Oh my God, Yukwon,” you immediately turned around at the sight of the building and began running. Yukwon caught up with you and held you.

“_________, what’s wrong? Don’t you at least want to go look at it?”

“How could you do this?” you yelled as tears formed in the corner of your eyes.

“_________ are you okay? It’s just your new university. What’s the big deal? Calm down.”

“No I will not calm down. I can’t believe you did this to me.” You yelled louder.

“People are watching us,” he said grinding his teeth.

“I don’t care Yukwon. You shouldn’t have done this.” You turned around and began running. You never wanted to see that building again.

*****************************************************

“Open the door _________,” Yukwon banged on the door.

“No!,” you shouted back. He couldn’t quite understand why you were reacting like that. He thought you were uncomfortable talking about starting university again but he didn’t know your reaction upon seeing it was going to be that extreme. Yukwon had spent all summer, trying to help you get rid of bad memories. You had responded pretty well so he thought it perfectly fine to take you there.

“Please let me in and talk to me.” This time he struggled with the door handle.

“Stop it oppa, just stop it,” you covered your ears and closed your eyes. Your breathing was getting rapid. You got up, opened the door and hugged Yukwon. He patted your back to comfort you. He, himself was just as scared. If he knew, your condition was going to get that bad he would have never taken you there.

Yukwon picked you up and carried you to your bed. “Just lay here alright?” he said sitting beside you. He ran his fingers through your hair till you fell asleep.

****************************************************

A few days later:

You walked into Block B’s dorm casually and made yourself comfortable on the couch.

“Oh thank God, you’re here. Can you please cook me something I’m starving.” P.O said excitedly, upon seeing you.

“Really oppa? Really?” you said with a warm smile, getting up. He nodded back.

“I’m starving,” he rubbed his tummy. You sighed and made your way to the kitchen. You were at their dorm so you could talk to Yukwon. Ever since the incident a few days back, you hadn’t been able to really open up to him. You still weren’t ready but not seeing him was killing you on the inside. In fact you had no idea how you were going to face him.

“Look who decided to show up!,” Yukwon held your from behind and planted a kiss on your neck.

“Oh hey,” you replied, acting as normal as possible.

“Who are you cooking that for?” he asked.

“P.O is hungry.”

“Really, but he just ate like an hour ago.”

“I don’t know,” You shrugged your shoulders and went back to mixing the Kimchi. Yukwon watched you cook the food. He was having the urge to ask you but he didn’t want to be bogged down with your irritation. Nevertheless, he was worried about you and he really did want to know what was going on.

“So,… ahh.. are you ready to talk about what happened last time?” he asked hesitantly.

 “Not in front of the boys oppa,” you mumbled, without looking at him.

After you served the food to P.O, Yukwon dragged you to his room and locked the door so no one would disturb the two of you.

“Okay now tell me what’s going on?” he asked rather softly.

“I don’t know,” you buried your face into your hands and sat at the corner of the bed.

“Jagiya, if you don’t tell me how will I be able to help you? I don’t want you to go through this alone.”

“It’s the same thing as before. It’s the same thing. Don’t you get it? I don’t want to embarrass myself in front of you. I’m still scared oppa. I don’t want to go back anymore. I failed once I don’t want to fail again.”

“It wasn’t your fault __________… and you didn’t fail.”

“I did. I disappointed my parents. I disappointed my teachers. I disappointed everybody who had faith in me. Do you know what it feels like to be on the top and then one thing, that one thing brings you down. Had I listened to everybody, I wouldn’t have been in such a position. I was too overconfident.”

“And no you’re not confident at all.”

“I am but..”

“_________, all of this is very irrational. You are suddenly afraid of going to school. It doesn’t make sense to me.”

“Fears are irrational…”

“I know baby,” he held your hands tightly. “But, all of a sudden. It just doesn’t make sense. There has got to be a better explanation for this. I don’t want you to miss this semester too. It’ll hurt you in the long run. You need to go back.”

Your head was starting to hurt.

“Listen, ummm can we not talk about this?” you asked a little sternly. You appreciated the fact that he was trying to help but the more he talked about it, the more your heart raced. You lifted the covers and hid under them.

“Are you seriously doing this?” he asked.

“Ye,” you mumbled from other the covers. He sighed but slid in besides you after a while. He pulled you closer to him and kissed you several times. Surprisingly, you fell asleep fairly quickly.

Yukwon slipped out of bed to look for his laptop. He had some research to do that night…

**************************************

“Good morning beautiful,” Yukwon handed you a cup of coffee. You stretched and yawned, taking the cup from him.

“Are the boys mad I slept here again?” you asked scrunching your nose.

“Aniyo, they’re used to it now,” he winked at you.

“So I was doing some research last night,” he said playing with your hair.

“What kind of research?” you asked.

“About your condition.”

“So you think I have a condition..” you raised your eyebrows.

“No, no.. I didn’t mean it like that. I meant..”

“It’s okay oppa,” you smiled. That was the first time, in many days. It gave Yukwon some hope.

“Okay ________ I know this might sound scary but you might have Didaskaleinophobia.”

“What?” you snapped.

“It means you have a phobia of going to school.”

“What?” you repeated.

“Ye, Now I know it’s too early to say anything since I searched it online but looking at all the symptoms, it seems like you do have it. After that incident before the summer, you might have developed it. It’s perfectly normal and we can go talk to a therapist about it.”

“But..” you were completely dumbfounded.

“Don’t worry _________, I’ll get you through this. You’ll be fine. I promise you.” He pulled you into a tight hug because he knew you would start crying any second. You were very sensitive. He always took extra care of you, while handling such things.

*****************************************************

Yukwon had convinced you to go to the therapist. To his surprise, he was right. You really had developed a phobia. It was hard talking about it because you considered yourself perfectly fine.

Yukwon had called you at 6 am that morning and asked you to meet him at the park. You walked, there still half asleep, yawning continuously.

“What is it?” you asked, seeing him standing behind a tree. He motioned for you to walk closer to him. You did as he said. He held your hands so you wouldn’t run away this time.

“Do you remember what the therapist said in the last session.”

“What?” you asked.

To get rid of your fear you have to face them..”  

Your mouth fell half open. “No!,” you gasped.

“Ye,” he nodded and pulled you towards the building once again. Your legs gave up on you. You felt like all of your energy was slowly draining out of your body.

“I’m with you. Don’t be scared,” he whispered to help you calm your nerves. You held his hands even more tightly and closed your eyes. There was one thing you knew for you sure and that was that Yukwon was not going to give up.

You were glad he was there with you. No matter how stubborn you were, he was willing to help you. You ignored your shaking legs, freezing hands and racing heart. After all, it was time you faced your fears…

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My friend decided to skype me while I was writing the last paragraph so I apologize if it doesn’t make sense! I totally got lost writing this one and I apologize for that :|   

posted 6 years ago with 19 notes